* Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846. * John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946. * Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860. * John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960. * The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters. * Both were particularly concerned with civil rights. * Both wives lost their children while living in the White House. * Both Presidents were shot on a Friday. * Both Presidents were shot in the head. * Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy. * Kennedy's secretary was named Lincoln. * Both were assassinated by Southerners. * Both were succeeded by Southerners. * Both successors were named Johnson. * Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808. * Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908. * John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839. * Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939. * Both assassins were known by their three names. * Both names are comprised of fifteen letters. * Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Kennedy'. * Kennedy was shot in a car called 'Lincoln'. * Booth ran from the theater and was caught in a warehouse. * Oswald ran from a warehouse and was caught in a theater. * Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials. And here's the kicker... * A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland. * A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.
MURPHY'S LAWS OF COMBAT
Or: Never forget weapons are made by the lowest bidder
1. You are not Superman. (Freshly graduated recruits from Viper and Primus and all Martial Artists, especially, take note.)
2. Suppression fire - won't.
3. If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.
4. Don't look conspicuous - it draws fire.
5. When in doubt, empty the magazine.
6. Never forget your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
7. If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
8. No plan survives the first contact intact.
9. All five second grenade fuses will burn down in three seconds.
10. Try to look unimportant because the bad guys may be running low on ammo.
11. If you are forward of your position, the artillery will fall short.
12. The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.
13. The important things are always simple.
14. The simple things are always hard.
15. The easy way is always mined.
16. If your are short of everything except enemy, you are in combat.
17. When you have secured the area, don't forget to tell the enemy.
18. Incoming fire has the right of way.
19. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
20. No inspection ready units has ever passed combat.
21. If the enemy is in range, SO ARE YOU.
22. Friendly fire - isn't.
23. Things that must be together to work will not be shipped together.
24. Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately.
Corollary: RADAR tends to fail at night and in bad weather and especially during both.
25. Anything you do can get you shot, including doing nothing.
26. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.
27. Tracers work both ways.
28. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
29. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more that your fair share to take.
30. When both sides are convinced they are about to lose, they're both right.
31. Professional soldiers are predicable but the world is full of amateurs.
32. Murphy's Law: anything that can go wrong will
O'Toole's Corollary to Murphy's Law: Murphy was an optimist.